Index desk · Solana · 00:00:00 desk time
CAT6900
The benchmark index for cats. Twelve constituents, six sectors, rebalanced quarterly by a cat knocking things off a table.
Computed from naps, stretches and how hard each cat is staring at the door.
DESK STATUS: committee asleep on the keyboard · contract soon
01 · Index board
Constituents
Rebalance it yourself. Delist a cat. The committee will put out a notice either way.
| Cat | Sector | Weight | Mood | Action |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Biscuit | Orange | 11.4% | +0.0 |
No corporate actions today. One constituent is asleep in the printer tray.
Annual constituents photo. Two cats moved. Weights were adjusted accordingly.
02 · Methodology
How the index is built
Version 6.9. Read it once, it does not get longer.
Eligibility
Any cat that sits on a keyboard for three seconds is eligible. Dogs applied. Dogs were declined.
Weighting
Weight equals loaf volume, measured when the cat is fully tucked. Standing up during measurement gets you weighted by vibes.
Rebalancing
Quarterly. A committee member pushes an object off the desk, and the constituent closest to where it lands gets the biggest weight.
Sectors
Tabby, Void, Orange, Loaf, Tuxedo, Calico. Loaf is a posture, so membership changes whenever someone gets up.
Removal
A constituent leaves the index when it leaves the room. Re-entry happens at dinner.
Data feed
Index data runs over one blue Cat6 cable. It gets chewed weekly; outages are logged as naps.
Divisor
The divisor is 6900 because that number fit on the sign.
03 · Corporate actions
Notices from the committee
- Q3
Rebalance executed. A glass of water went off the desk, Orange sector went to 31%.
- ADD
Kevin joins the index after lying across the spreadsheet for a full afternoon.
- HALT
Trading paused for 14 minutes. A red dot appeared on the wall.
- FIX
Void sector restated: what looked like two black cats was one black cat and a shadow.
- OUT
Cat6 backbone chewed through. Backup cable also chewed. Same cat.
- DIV
Dividend paid in kind: one moth, delivered to the pillow at 4 am.
04 · Access
How to get exposure to cats
- 1
Install Phantom or any Solana wallet.
- 2
Put some SOL in it.
- 3
Copy the contract from the listing field up top, it says soon until launch.
- 4
Open it on Pump, swap SOL for it, and you own a slice of twelve cats.